Chasing Happy

Dear Gavin Rossdale,

Merry Christmas! First off, let me say how cute your little family is. I like your kids’ names, especially the new one. The name Zuma makes me think of a little tiny baby running real fast, sort of like a member of the Incredibles, really. I enjoy how much you and your wife seem to enjoy hanging out (even though I have to admit, I think she was just plain getting away with something with that “Sweet Escape” song). And your bacon and eggs Halloween ensemble was super cute.

I hope the New Year brings you many wonderful gifts. Specifically, I hope it brings you the gift of singing a song that doesn’t make me want to take a cheese grater to my ears.

Happy Holidays!

e

Dear People Magazine,

Feliz Navidad! I never ever read your magazine anymore, largely because you devote eleventy-million pages to reviews of music and books that everyone knows are crap, otherwise they wouldn’t be reviewed in People.

Still, I caught your cover today, and I just have to say, if you think that dress Reese Witherspoon wore is ok, then I have to say that maybe the demise of printed media is not such a disaster. You are leading the people astray.

Here’s to lookin’ fine in 2009!

e

Dear people sort of newly related to me,

Hyvaa joulua! (Holla, Finland!) I know we’re sort of new to being related, but there’s one thing you should have guessed by now.

If you provide me with a Christmas list that includes things such as beef jerky and english muffins, please know that I am always always going to laugh at that and never stop. And then I’ll probably tell my family, and they’ll do the same.

You’re getting a book.

e

Dear D’oh,

The next time you sign me up to make something for you to bring to work on a Tuesday, meaning I have to make that thing on a Monday, remember one thing:

You usually fall asleep first.

Fa la la la la!

e